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A GOOD SOLUTION

"Look at this!" Mommy said. "See how I spend my holidays? All I ever see is dirty dishes. Piles of dirty dishes!"

Daddy sighed in sympathy and leaned back on the couch.

Mommy saw how comfortable he was and said, "I don't need your false sighs of sympathy. I'm giving you both exactly until lunch time to think of a way to help me with the dishes. If you don't come up with anything good I'll stop cooking for you. You can just go hungry. And I mean you, too, Dennis."

I went to sit on the windowsill and began thinking. First of all, I was afraid she'd really stop cooking, and then I'd die of starvation. Secondly, I really did want to think of something good. I sat there thinking, looking at Daddy every now and then to see how he was coming along, but I saw he had no intention of doing any thinking. First, he went off and shaved. Then he put on a clean shirt. Then he read the papers. And then he turned on the radio.

I started thinking faster. I decided to make an electric dishwasher. For a starter, I unscrewed our floor polisher and Daddy's electric razor, just a little bit, but I couldn't think of a place to hang the dishtowel. The way I had it, the minute I turned on the dishwasher the razor would slice up the towel. So I screwed everything back again and started thinking of something else. After about two hours I remembered the piece I'd read in the paper about a conveyer belt and thought of something really good. When it was time for lunch and we all took our places at the table I said,

"Well, Daddy? Did you think of anything?"

"What?"

"I mean about washing the dishes. Or else Mommy'll stop cooking for us."

"She was only fooling. Why, she'll never starve her only son and beloved husband." He chuckled.

"I was not fooling!" Mommy said. "Just you wait and see. You should be ashamed of yourselves! How many times have I told you I'm sick and tired of doing the dishes every day! It's not at all nice of you to sit on the windowsill, shave and listen to the radio while I'm ruining my life washing your dirty dishes."

"All right," Daddy said. "We'll think of something. But first, let's have lunch. This really is a storm in a teacup!"

"Oh, it is, is it?" Mommy looked real mad. "I never thought you'd say such a thing! Well, if that's the case, there won't be any lunch. See how you like that!"

She pressed her fingers to her head and stood up. She just stood there, looking at Daddy for a long time. He folded his arm across his chest and rocked back and forth in his chair, looking straight at her. Neither of them said a word. And there was no lunch. I was starved, so I said,

"It's just Daddy who didn't think of anything, Mommy. I did!

Don't you worry. I thought of something really good. So let's have lunch."

"What is it?"

"It's a very good solution."

"Tell me."

"How many plates, bowls, forks, knives, spoons and cups do you wash each time?" I asked.

"Three of each."

"Your worries are over. From now on you'll only have to wash one of each. I've thought of a real good solution!"

"Let's hear it," Daddy said.

"Let's have lunch first. I'll tell you while we're eating, because I'm starved."

"All right," Mommy said and sighed. "Let's have a lunch."

"Well?" Daddy said as we were eating.

"It's really very simple. You won't even believe how simple it is, Mommy! Now, as soon as it's time for dinner you set one place. Then you put a bowl of soup on the table, sit down and eat your soup. Then you call Daddy and say, 'Dinner's ready.'"

"Daddy goes to wash his hands, and while he's washing them you finish your soup and fill the bowl up again for him.

"When Daddy's done washing his hands he says to me, 'Time for dinner, Dennis. Go wash your hands.'

"Then I go to wash my hands. Meanwhile, you're having the main dish on a dinner plate. Daddy's having his soup. I'm washing my hands. After I'm through washing them I come to the kitchen. By then Daddy's through with his soup and you're through with your meat, so that Daddy ladles my soup into his bowl and you serve him his meat on your empty plate. Then I have my soup, Daddy has his meat, and you have dessert from a dessert plate."

"By the time Daddy's through with his meat, I'll be through with my soup. Then he puts my meat on his empty plate, and since

you've finished your dessert, you put his dessert on your empty plate. I set aside my empty soup bowl and start eating my meat, while Daddy's having his dessert. By this time you're all through with dinner, so you can wash the soup bowl.

"While you're washing it I finish my meat and Daddy finishes his dessert. Then he dishes out my dessert and hands you my dinner plate. I gobble up my dessert and hand you my dessert plate. Isn't that simple? So you'll only have to wash one of each instead of three of each. Hooray!"

"Hooray," Mommy said. "If not for the fact that it's unhygienic."

"Don't be silly," I said. "We're all one family. I don't mind eating after Daddy at all. He's my Daddy. Or after you. You're my Mommy."

"It's really a very good idea," Daddy said. "But still, it's much nicer when we all sit down to dinner together instead of doing it in three shifts."

"But it'll make life easier for Mommy, because she'll have three times less dishes to wash."

"You know, I think I've thought of something, too," Daddy said. "It's not as efficient as your method, but still..."

Daddy got up. He rolled up his sleeves and began stacking the dishes. "I'll show you a very simple method. The idea is that from now on you and I are going to do the dishes, Dennis."

He carried the dishes to the sink. We washed them all. Just two of everything, though, because I broke my dishes. It was an accident. I was too busy thinking about the good solution Daddy'd thought of to see where I was going.


 
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